Tag: confrontation
How to Get Out from “Under the Bus”
“They threw me under the bus” is one of the most common expressions of complaint among employees who see themselves as the victims of intra- or inter-team sniping. Whenever I hear it, I picture tire... Continue reading
Reframing a Tattler’s Tale
Have you ever had to work with a tattletale? The parallels between childhood tattling and workplace tale-bearing came to mind while I was visiting a friend whose child kept appealing for adult intervention in her... Continue reading
6 Ways Not to Put a Problem on the Table
Let’s say you’ve identified a problem in your organization -- something that’s not working well or isn’t working at all, something that you know should be fixed or changed. And let’s say you’ve already analyzed... Continue reading
4 Aspects of Managing Your Fight-or-Flight Response
The body’s fight-or-flight reactions are a good guide to our true perceptions of a confrontation’s level of safety or danger. Learning to check and manage our physical reactions is essential to both our effectiveness and... Continue reading
4 Steps to Clarify Your Assumptions in a Conflict
We may talk about the importance of not making assumptions, but we all make them, automatically, all the time. We tend to believe that other people are more like us than not, which explains some... Continue reading
How to Avoid the Mortal Combat of Personal Criticism
It’s normal to be “conflict-averse.” Most of us tend to try to avoid creating bad feelings among people. We shy away from anything that seems like a secret, can’t be helped, or isn’t worth getting... Continue reading
Can You Handle the Truth of a Compassionate Confrontation?
In some organizations, the fear of overt, explicit conflict -- and the pain and disruption that it can engender -- is even stronger than the fear of leaving existentially damaging problems unaddressed. You may have... Continue reading
A Positive Charge for a Negative Employee
How do you handle a perpetually negative employee? You may get an idea from this bit of conversation that I had with a distressed client about a pivotal but consistently negative staff member we’ll refer... Continue reading